摘要：新年來臨之際是重新塑造自我的良機(jī)。如何塑造呢?我認(rèn)為，關(guān)鍵在于換個角度來理解我們所做的選擇。對很多人而言，生命中最重要的一些選擇是痛苦、恐懼、無力的根源，甚至?xí)屓水a(chǎn)生抑郁和自殺傾向。但事情并不一定非是如此不可。

　　THE annual ritual of the New Year’s resolution — I’lllose 10 pounds, get my finances in order, be morepatient with my family, feel more grateful — missesthe point. We try to steel our wills to do what wealready know we should be doing. Kick-in-the-pantsreminders, however stern, are missed opportunitiesfor genuine self-renewal. (Not to mention that theshelf life of any motivational juice we generate inJanuary tends to expire in February.)

　　制定新年規(guī)劃這個一年一度的常規(guī)動作——我要減重10磅，要解決財務(wù)問題，要更耐心地對待家人，要更知道感恩——總是放錯重點。我們竭力強(qiáng)化意志，去做已經(jīng)意識到自己該做的那些事情。但好似“催命符”的備忘錄不管多嚴(yán)苛，都無法激勵人們進(jìn)行真正的自我更新。(更別提1月份才成形的這些宏圖大志是多么容易過期，2月份一到，它們往往就宣告破產(chǎn)。)

　　The turning over of a new year is an opportunity to create ourselves anew. How? The key, Isuggest, is in shifting our understanding of the choices we make. For many people, the mostimportant choices in life are sources of agony, dread, paralysis — even depression orsuicide. It doesn’t have to be like this.

　　新年來臨之際是重新塑造自我的良機(jī)。如何塑造呢?我認(rèn)為，關(guān)鍵在于換個角度來理解我們所做的選擇。對很多人而言，生命中最重要的一些選擇是痛苦、恐懼、無力的根源，甚至?xí)屓水a(chǎn)生抑郁和自殺傾向。但事情并不一定非是如此不可。

　　A hypothetical example: Eve works as a textbook editor at a Boston publishing house and wasapproached by a small but prestigious imprint on the West Coast that was looking for afiction editor. The job would be a big promotion, with a significant raise, and Eve had alwayswanted to work in fiction.

　　比方說，伊芙是波士頓某出版社的教科書編輯，西海岸一家正在尋找小說編輯的出版公司找到了她。該公司規(guī)模雖小，但卻久負(fù)盛名。接受這份工作，伊芙的職位會大大提升，薪水會大幅提高，而且她一直都想在小說領(lǐng)域發(fā)展。

　　But Eve is in crisis. Should she move her husband and young daughter from their cozy life inBoston, her home of 15 years, to the wilds of California? If she stays, will she be forsaking theopportunity of a lifetime? If she moves, will her new boss turn out to be a jerk? Will her childbe bullied at school? What if her husband can’t find a good job? Will the family quarrel, themarriage dissolve, her boss fire her for being incompetent, and she and her child end up onfood stamps in a homeless shelter?

　　但伊芙卻面臨著艱難的抉擇。她已經(jīng)在波士頓生活了15年，該讓丈夫和年幼的女兒拋開這里的愜意生活，與她一起搬走嗎?如果選擇留在波士頓，她能夠割舍一生中難得的機(jī)遇嗎?如果選擇搬去西海岸，要是發(fā)現(xiàn)新老板是個混球可怎么辦?要是她的孩子在學(xué)校挨欺負(fù)可怎么辦?要是她丈夫找不到好工作可怎么辦?家里是否會爭吵不斷，婚姻是否會解體，老板是否會因為她無法勝任工作而炒她魷魚，她和孩子是否會落得在收容所靠食品券度日的田地?

　　Many people are like Eve and see their choices as, in essence, problems of computation. Butchoosing between jobs is not like computing the distance between Memphis and Mumbai. Theview of choice as a matter of calculating maximal value is assumed in cost-benefit analysis,government policy making and much of economic theory. It’s even embedded in the apps youcan download that purport to help you decide whether to buy a new car, get married or changejobs.

　　許多人都和伊芙差不多，他們其實把選擇看成了計算利害得失的問題。但在不同工作之間做出選擇，跟測量從孟菲斯到孟買的距離可不是一回事。把選擇看作對價值最大化的計算，是內(nèi)化于成本收益分析、政府決策過程以及許多經(jīng)濟(jì)理論之中的一種觀念。它甚至潛藏在可以從網(wǎng)上下載的某些旨在幫助你決定是否要買新車、是否要結(jié)婚、是否要換工作的應(yīng)用程序之中。

　　At the heart of this model is a simple assumption: that what you should choose is alwaysdetermined by facts in the world about which option has more value — facts that, if only youwere smart enough to discover, would make decision-making relatively easy.

　　該模型的核心假設(shè)非常簡單：你的選擇總是取決于世界上的某些與哪個選項會帶來更大價值有關(guān)的事實——你只要聰明到足以發(fā)現(xiàn)這些事實，就能夠相對容易地做出決策。

　　But the assumption is false. When we compute distances, there are only three possibilities:one distance is more than, less than or equal to another. Similarly, when we compute value,there are only three possibilities: one thing is better than, worse than or just as good asanother. But we shouldn’t assume that goodness is like distance. Values don’t have the samestructure as facts.

　　但這個假設(shè)是錯誤的。我們測算距離的時候，所面對的可能性只有三種：一段距離比另一段長，比另一段短，或者跟另一段相等。同樣，我們計算價值的時候，所面對的可能性也只有三種：一個事物比另一個好，比另一個糟，或者跟另一個差不多。但我們不該把事物的好壞和距離的長短等同起來。價值的體系和事實的體系是截然不同的。

　　Options can be “on a par” — different in value while being in the same overall neighborhood. Ifyour alternatives are on a par, you can’t make a mistake of reason in choosing one instead ofthe other. Since one isn’t better than the other, you can’t choose wrongly. But nor are theyequally good. When alternatives are on a par, when the world doesn’t determine a single rightthing to do, that doesn’t mean that value writ large has been exhausted. Instead of lookingoutward to find the value that determines what you should do, you can look inward to what youcan stand behind, commit to, resolve to throw yourself behind. By committing to an option,you can confer value on it.

　　各種選項可能會“平分秋色”——雖然價值不完全相同，但也相差無幾。如果你有一些平分秋色的選項，你無論選擇哪個，都不會犯判斷上的錯誤。因為兩種選擇沒有優(yōu)劣之分，你不可能做出錯誤的選擇。不過，它們也并非一樣好。當(dāng)選項平分秋色時，當(dāng)世界上并非只有唯一正確的答案時，那并不意味著真正的價值已經(jīng)枯竭。與其從外部尋找價值來判斷自己應(yīng)該做些什么，你可以向內(nèi)心來詢問自己能夠支持、承諾，以及決心投身于什么。只要篤定于一個選項，你就為它賦予了價值。

　　Of course, this isn’t to say that you should commit to being a first-class jerk, pedophile ormurderer. That’s because being a jerk is not on a par with being a good person.

　　當(dāng)然了，這并不是說你應(yīng)該篤定于成為一個頭號混蛋、戀童癖，或者殺人犯。這是因為，做一個混蛋和做一個好人可不是平分秋色的選項。

　　When we choose between options that are on a par, we make ourselves the authors of our ownlives. Instead of being led by the nose by what we imagine to be facts of the world, we shouldinstead recognize that sometimes the world is silent about what we should do. In those cases,we can create value for ourselves by committing to an option. By doing so, we not only createvalue for ourselves but we also (re)create ourselves. Eve might resolve to make her life inBoston. Someone else, in her shoes, might resolve to start a new life in California. There is noerror here, only different resolutions that create different sorts of people.

　　當(dāng)我們在平分秋色的選項中做選擇時，我們就成了自己人生的創(chuàng)造者。我們不應(yīng)該被我們想象中的世界現(xiàn)實牽著鼻子走，而是應(yīng)該認(rèn)識到，有時，這個世界不會告訴我們應(yīng)該做什么。在這種情況下，我們應(yīng)該篤定一種選項，創(chuàng)造我們自己的價值。這樣做的話，我們不僅為自己創(chuàng)造了的價值，我們也(重新)創(chuàng)造了自己。伊芙可能決心在波士頓生活。而面臨同樣的境遇，另一個人可能會決定在加州開始新的生活。這無所謂對錯，只是不同的解決方案造就不同類型的人罷了。

　　So Eve, faced with her choice, should reflect on what kind of person she can be. Can she besomeone who abandons a contented life for a new adventure? A choice between alternativesthat are on a par is a precious opportunity to create the sort of person she can commit tobeing, by committing to being that sort of person.

　　因此，伊芙在做出選擇時，應(yīng)該考慮的是，她能成為什么樣的人。她能為了新的冒險而放棄舒適的生活嗎?在平分秋色的選項中做決定是一個寶貴的機(jī)會，可以創(chuàng)造出一個自己能夠決心成為的人，方法就是下決心成為那種類型的人。

　　Many of the choices we face in the new year will be between alternatives that are on a par. Ourtask then is to reflect on what kind of person we can commit to being when making thosechoices. Can we commit to forgoing a much-needed new car and give the money to charityinstead? Can we commit to staying in a secure 9-to-5 job rather than starting the businesswe’ve always dreamed of? Can we commit to having a parent with Alzheimer’s move in with us,rather than paying to put her in a nursing home?

　　我們在新年伊始面臨的許多選擇都是平分秋色的選項。因此，在做出這些決定時，我們的任務(wù)就是思考，我們能下決心成為什么樣的人。我們能放棄一輛急需的新車，把錢捐給慈善機(jī)構(gòu)嗎?我們能滿足于朝九晚五的安穩(wěn)工作，放棄創(chuàng)業(yè)的夢想嗎?我們愿意把患有阿爾茨海默癥的母親接來與我們同住，而不是花錢把她送到養(yǎng)老院嗎?

　　So in this new year, let’s not do the same old, same old; let’s not resolve to work harder atbeing the selves that we already are. Instead, let’s resolve to make ourselves into the selvesthat we can commit to being.

　　因此，在這個新年到來之際，我們不要年復(fù)一年地做同樣的事了;在新年的規(guī)劃中，不要下決心更努力地做本來的自己。相反，我們要把自己變成想要成為的那個人。

　　要悟透自己 就是正確認(rèn)識自己

　　In all one's life time it is oneself that one spends the most time being with or dealing with. But it is precisely oneself that one has the least understanding of.

　　When you are going upwards in life you tend to overestimate yourself. It seems that everything you seek for is within your reach; luck and opportunities will come your way and you are overjoyed that they constitute part of your worth. When you are going downhill you tend to underestimate yourself, mistaking difficulties and adversities for your own incompetence. It’s likely that you think it wise for yourself to know your place and stay aloof from worldly wearing a mask of cowardice, behind which the flow of sap in your life will be retarded.

　　人生在世，和“自己”相處最多，打交道最多，但是往往悟不透“自己”.

　　人生走上坡路時，往往把自己估計過高，似乎一切所求的東西都能垂手可得，甚至把運氣和機(jī)遇也看做自己身價的一部分而喜不自勝.人在不得意時，又往往把自己估計過低，把困難和不利也看做自己的無能，以至把安分守己，與世無爭誤認(rèn)為有自知之明，而實際上往往被怯懦的面具窒息了自己鮮活的生命.

　　To get a thorough understanding of oneself is to gain a correct view of oneself and be a sober realist -- aware of both one’s strength and shortage. You may look forward hopefully to the future but be sure not to expect too much, for ideals can never be fully realized. You may be courageous to meet challenges but it should be clear to you where to direct your efforts. That’s to way so long as you have a perfect knowledge of yourself there won’t be difficulties you can’t overcome, nor obstacles you can’t surmount.

　　悟透自己，就是正確認(rèn)識自己，也就是說要做一個冷靜的現(xiàn)實主義者，既知道自己的優(yōu)勢，也知道自己的不足.我們可以憧憬人生，但期望值不能過高.因為在現(xiàn)實中，理想總是會打折扣的.可以迎接挑戰(zhàn).但是必須清楚自己努力的方向.也就是說，人一旦有了自知之明，也就沒有什么克服不了的困難，沒有什么過不去的難關(guān).

　　To get a thorough understanding of oneself needs selfappreciation. Whether you liken yourself to a towering tree or a blade of grass, whether you think you are a high mountain or a small stone, you represent a state of nature that has its own raison deter. If you earnestly admire yourself you’ll have a real sense of self-appreciation, which will give you confidence. As soon as you gain full confidence in yourself you’ll be enabled to fight and overcome any adversity.

　　要悟透自己就要欣賞自己.無論你是一棵參天大樹，還是一棵小草，無論你成為一座巍峨的高山，還是一塊小小的石頭，都是一種天然，都有自己存在的價值.只要你認(rèn)真地欣賞自己，你就會擁有一個真正的自我.只有自我欣賞才會有信心，一旦擁有了信心也就擁有了抵御一切逆境的動力.

　　To get a thorough understanding of oneself also requires doing oneself a favor when it’s needed. In time of anger, do yourself a favor by giving vent to it in a quiet place so that you won't be hurt by its flames; in time of sadness, do yourself a favor by sharing it with your friends so as to change a gloomy mood into a cheerful one; in time of tiredness, do yourself a favor by getting a good sleep or taking some tonic. Show yourself loving concern about your health and daily life. As you are aware, what a person physically has is but a human body that’s vulnerable when exposed to the elements. So if you fall ill, it’s up to you to take a good care of yourself. Unless you know perfectly well when and how to do yourself a favor, you won’t be confident and ready enough to resist the attack of illness.

　　要悟透自己，就要心疼自己.在氣憤時心疼一下自己，找個僻靜處散散心，宣泄宣泄，不要讓那些無名之火傷身;憂傷時，要心疼一下自己，找個三五好友，訴說訴說，讓感情的陰天變晴;勞累時，你要心疼一下自己，為自己來一番問寒問暖，要明白人所擁有的不過是一個血肉之軀，經(jīng)不住太多的風(fēng)力霜劍;有病時，你要心疼一下自己，惟有對自己的心疼，才是戰(zhàn)勝疾病的信心和力量.

　　To get a thorough understanding of oneself is to get a full control of one’s life. Then one will find one’s life full of color and flavor。

　　悟透了自己，才能把握住自己，你生活才會有滋有味!