短小精悍的英語笑話精選

　　笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創(chuàng)作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來的短小精悍的英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　短小精悍的英語笑話精選

　　Boy, Oh Boy

　　When they're together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. "All right, you two," I said sternly. "No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting."

　　As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, "C'mon, Steven, let's get dirty . "

　　Notes:

　　(1) tend to(do)傾向;趨向

　　(2) mayhem n.大混亂;大災(zāi)害

　　(3) put one's foot down開始抗議

　　(4) sternly adv.嚴(yán)厲地

　　(5) whine v.哭鬧

　　(6) tease v.取笑

　　(7) tattle v.扯淡

　　Exercises:

　　根據(jù)短文回答下列問題：

　?、?How old is the son?

　?、?What do they tend to do when the son and his cousin are together?

　　③ What does "Put one's foot down" mean here?

　?、?Did the boy obey the father's order?

　?、?What did they do then?

　　61.讓人無奈的孩子

　　我五歲的兒子和他的表弟在一起的時(shí)候，總要招來大亂。一個(gè)星期六，我開始抗議了。“好啦，你們兩個(gè)，”我嚴(yán)厲地說，“不許叫喊，不許亂拿，不許哭鬧，不許亂敲，不許取笑，不許扯淡，不許弄壞玩具，不許亂抓，不許打架。”

　　我剛轉(zhuǎn)身要走，就聽我兒子說：“來，斯蒂文，我們來把自己弄臟吧。”

　　練習(xí)參考答案：

　　① Five.

　?、?They tend to cause mayhem.

　?、?it means "to make up one's mind to stop sth from happening".

　?、?No, he didn't

　?、?They began to get dirty.

　　短小精悍的英語笑話閱讀

　　I Cant Let Him Get Away

　　A male crab met a female crab and asked her to marry him. She noticed that he was walking straight instead of sideways. Wow, she thought, this crab is really special. I can't let him get away .So they got married immediately.

　　The next day she noticed her new husband waking sideways like all the other crabs, and got upset. "What happened?" she asked. "You used to walk straight before we were married."

　　"Oh, honey, " he replied, "I can't drink that much every day.

　　Notes:

　　(1) crab n.螃蟹

　　(2) sideways adv.側(cè)著;斜著

　　Exercises:

　　根據(jù)短文判斷下列句子正(T)、(F)：

　　① The female crab liked the male crab at her first sight.

　?、?The female crab noticed that the male crab was walking sideways when she first met him.

　　③ The female crab agreed to marry the male crab because she considered him special.

　?、?The male crab walked straight only because he got drunk.

　　⑤ The moral of the story is that we should not judge a person so quickly.

　　62.不能讓他跑了

　　一只雄蟹遇到一只雌蟹，便要娶她為妻。她注意到他走路是直著走，而不是橫著走。哇!她想，這只雄蟹可真特別，我可不能讓他跑了。因此他們立刻結(jié)婚了。

　　第二天，她又發(fā)現(xiàn)她的新郎像其他蟹一樣橫著走路了。她深感不安。“你怎么了?”她問，“我們結(jié)婚前你可是直著走路的。”

　　“哦，寶貝，”他回答說，“我不可能每天都喝那么多。”

　　練習(xí)參考答案：

　?、賂②F③T④T⑤T

　　短小精悍的英語笑話學(xué)習(xí)

　　A Hasty Interruption

　　The fine-furniture store where I work has been in business since the 1920s.Recently I received a call from a woman who wanted to replace some chairs from a dining set purchased from us in the 1930s.I assured her we could help and sought the assistance of the office manager. "You'll never believe this one, " I told him." I just got a call from a customer who bought some chairs from us in the 1930s. "

　　Before I could finish repeating her request, he interrupted and said, "Don't tell me she hasn't received them yet!"

　　Notes:

　　(1) replace v.更換;替換

　　(2) purchase v.購買

　　(3) assure v.有信心地說

　　(4) seek v.尋求

　　(5) assistance n.幫助

　　Exercises:

　　根據(jù)短文選擇正確答案：

　　① Since when has the fine-furniture store been in business?

　　A. since the 1910s

　　B. since the 1920s

　　C. since the 1930s

　　D. since the 1940s

　?、?When did the woman customer buy the chairs in the store?

　　A. in the 1910s

　　B. in the 1920s

　　C. in the 1930s

　　D. in the 1940s

　?、?What did the woman customer want to do?

　　A. She wanted to return the chairs.

　　B. She wanted to sell the chairs.

　　C. She wanted to replace the chairs.

　　D. She wanted to repair the chairs.

　?、躊urchase " in " a dining set purchased from us" means _____.

　　A. to sell

　　B. to replace

　　C. to buy

　　D. to return

　　⑤ Why did the office manager interrupt before the man finished?

　　A. Because he thought it impossible for the woman not to have received the chairs.

　　B. Because he was angry with the poor efficiency of the store.

　　C. Because he was bad tempered.

　　D. Because he had something else to do at the moment.

　　63.匆忙的打斷

　　我所工作的精品商店是從二十年代以來就營業(yè)的。最近我接到一個(gè)婦女的電話。她想換一套餐具中的一些椅子。這套餐具她是在三十年代從我們這兒買的。我向她保證說我們可以幫忙并向部門經(jīng)理提了出來。“你永遠(yuǎn)也不會(huì)相信，”我對(duì)他說，“我剛接到一個(gè)顧客的電話，她在三十年代從我們這里買了一些椅子。”

　　我還沒來得及說她的要求，經(jīng)理就打斷了我的話：“不要告訴我她到現(xiàn)在還沒收到貨!”

　　練習(xí)參考答案：

　?、貰②C③C④C⑤A