好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話大全
笑話一般指短小、滑稽的故事,是一種民間口頭創(chuàng)作形式,在民間文化中以口口相傳的形式傳播。本文是好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!
好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話篇一
WALKING IN THE MOUNTAINS
A man was walking in the mountains just enjoying the scenery when he stepped too close to the edge of the mountain and started to fall. In desperation he reached out and grabbed a limb of a gnarly old tree hanging onto the side of the cliff.
Full of fear he assessed his situation. He was about 100 feet down a shear cliff and about 900 feet from the floor of the canyon below. If he should slip again he'd plummet to his death.
Full of fear, he cries out, "Help me!" But there was no answer. Again and again he cried out but to no avail. Finally he yelled, "Is anybody up there? "
A deep voice replied, "Yes, I'm up here."
"Who is it?"
"It's the Lord"
"Can you help me?"
"Yes, I can help."
"Help me!"
"Let go."
Looking around the man became full of panic. "What?!?!"
"Let go. I will catch you."
"Uh... Is there anybody else up there?"
好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話篇二
HOW TO GET RID OF A JEHOVAH'S WITNESS
When they ask, "Can I talk to you about God?" Reply, "Sure, what would you like to know?"
Answer the door with a bloody knife and say, "I'm sorry, could you come back in a half hour? We're not done with the virgin yet."
Answer the door with an automatic weapon and say 'Allah be Praised!
Ask them for their address. When they ask why you want it, claim that you want to appear on their doorstop univited so that you can peddle your own beliefs.
Look smug and tell them that your God can beat up their God.
Tell them you already have your own religion. When they ask what it is, wince a little before confessing, "er, I'm not sure if it's legal in this country
A chalk outline of a human body on the pavement, and a few copies of "The Watchtower"scattered around...
Answer every one of their questions with "What do you mean by that?" This might take a while, but you and your loved ones can have fun placing bets on how long it takes for them to leave.
Ask them to explain the story of Elisha and the Forty-two children.
Invite them in to see your fine collection of dinosaur fossils.
好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話篇三
STROLLING DOWN THE STREET ONE DAY
Two old Jewish men are strolling down the street one day when they happen to walk by a Catholic church. They see a big sign posted that says, "Covert to Catholicism and get ."
One of the Jewish men stops walking and stares at the sign. His friend turns to him and says, "Murray, what's going on?"
"Abe," replies Murray, "I'm thinking of doing it."
Abe says, "What are you, crazy?"
Murray thinks for a minute and says, "Abe, I'm going to do it."
With that, Murray strides purposefully into the church and comes out twenty minutes later with his head bowed. "So," asks Abe, "did you get your ten dollars?"
Murray looks up at him and says, "Is that all you people think of?"
好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話篇四
A PARTICULARLY HARD QUESTION
A nun dies and goes to heaven. St. Peter says to her, "I'm sure you've lead a virtuous life, Sister, but before I can let you into heaven, you must answer one question. What," asks St. Peter,"were Eve's first words when she saw Adam?"
"Boy," says the nun, "that's a hard one."
"That's right!" says St. Peter, and the pearly gates open wide.
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