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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語 > 英語閱讀 > 英語笑話 > 關(guān)于好笑的英語笑話

關(guān)于好笑的英語笑話

時間: 韋彥867 分享

關(guān)于好笑的英語笑話

  前蘇聯(lián)著名作家高爾基說過,“哪里有人,哪里就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調(diào)劑品”。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享關(guān)于好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話,希望可以幫助大家!

  關(guān)于好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話:A good witch

  One afternoon, there was this good witch who was flying along, when all of a sudden, she heard this soft crying from down below. When she landed, she saw this yellow frog. Touched by his sadness, the witch asked why he was crying.

  "Sniff. None of the other frogs will let me join in all their frog games. Boo hoo."

  "Don't cry, little one.", replied the witch, and with a wave of her magic wand, the frog turned green. All happy now, the frog was checking himself over when he noticed that his penis was still yellow. He asked an embarrassed witch about this, and she told him that there were some things that she just couldn't do, but if he saw the wizard, he'd fix things up for him.

  So happily, the little green frog hippity-hopped along his merry way.

  Feeling quick happy about herself, the witch once more took to the skies, and once again, she heard some crying, but this time of a thunderous sort. So down to the ground she flew only to discover a pink elephant. The witch asked him why he was crying.

  "Sniff. None of the other elephants will let me join in all their elephant games. Boo hoo."

  Now if you have ever seen an elephant cry, you know it to be a pathetic looking sight, but a PINK elephant crying is just downright heart-breaking, and that is just how the witch felt. So once again, she waved her magic wand, and *POOF*, the elephant was all grey.

  All happy now, the elephant was checking himself all over when he noticed that his penis was still pink. He asked an embarrassed witch about this, and she told him that there were some things that she just couldn't do, but if saw the wizard, he would fix things up for him.

  At this point, the elephant just started wailing. "I don't know where the wizard is", hesobbed.

  "Oh that's easy. Just follow the yellow pricked toad", said the good witch.

  關(guān)于好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話:My Dog 'Sex'

  Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy". I call my dog "Sex".

  Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to get his license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like to have one too." Then I said, "But this is a dog." He said I didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand, I've had Sex since I was 9 year old." He said I must have been quite a kid.

  When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the place was for sex. I said, "You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night." The Clerk said "Me too."

  One day I entered Sex in a contest but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Anothercontestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex entered in the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets. "But you don't understand", I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on television." He called me a show-off.

  When my wife and I separated, we went to court to file for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I got married." The judge said "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, Sex had left me. He said, "Me too."

  Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked "What are you doing in this alley at 4 in the morning?" I said, "I'm looking for Sex..."

  My case comes up on Friday...

  關(guān)于好笑的經(jīng)典英語笑話:Ambitious mother

  A guy walks into a bar with a small dog. The bartender says, "Get out of here with that dog!"

  The guy says, "But this isn't just any dog... this dog can play the piano!"

  The bartender replies, "Well, if he can play that piano, you both can stay... and have a drink on the house!"

  So the guy sits the dog on the piano stool, and the dog starts playing. Ragtime, Mozart... and the bartender and patrons are enjoying the music.

  Suddenly a bigger dog runs in, grabs the small dog by the scruff of the neck, and drags him out. The bartender asks the guy, "What was that all about?"

  The guy replies, "Oh, that was his mother. She wanted him to be a doctor."

  
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