好笑的英語笑話大全
笑話是日常生活中常見的一種幽默。與一般日常會話不同,笑話刻意違反合作原則,由此衍生出會話含意,并利用會話含意之間的沖突實現(xiàn)其預(yù)定功能。小編精心收集了好笑的英語笑話,供大家欣賞學習!
好笑的英語笑話:Three People 三個人
A man visiting a graveyard saw a tombstone that read, "Here lies John Kelly, a lawyer and an honest man."
"How about that!" he exclaimed. "They've got three people buried in one grave."
有一個人參觀墓地時見到一塊墓碑上寫著:“在這里安息的是約翰凱利,一個律師,一個誠實的人。”
“這是怎么回事!”他叫了起來。“他們在一個墳?zāi)沽寺窳巳齻€人。”
好笑的英語笑話:Who Are Crooks? 誰是騙子?
A newspaper once carried an editorial which stated bluntly(坦率地) that half the city council were crooks. Under penalty of arrest, the editor issued following retraction(撤銷) : Half the city council aren't crooks.
一次,一份報紙刊登了一篇社論,直接指出市議會里有一半人是騙子。在被罰以拘留后,編輯發(fā)表了以下聲明:市議會里有一半人不是騙子。
好笑的英語笑話:Good Sight 好視力
Lawyer: You say you were about thirty-five feet away from the scene of the accident? Just how far can you see clearly?
Witness: Well, when I wake up in the morning I see the Sun, and they tell me it's about ninety-three million miles away.
律師:你說你離事故現(xiàn)場約有35英尺,你能看清多遠的東西?
證人:這么說吧,早上起床后我看見太陽,別人告訴我這大約有9300萬英里遠。
好笑的英語笑話:Do What You Can 盡力而為就好
In a courtroom, the judge sentenced a criminal to thirty years in prison and the prisoner said, "But Sir, I won’t live that long!" So the judge replied, "Don't worry, just do what you can!" 在法庭上,法官宣判某個罪犯要服三十年徒刑。犯人說:“不過庭上,我活不了那么久啊!” 法官說:“別擔心!你盡力而為就好。”
好笑的英語笑話:I'm the groom
A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain." "Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back." "But, officer, I just wanted to say,..." "And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!" A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back." "Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm the groom."
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