爆笑校園英文笑話閱讀
爆笑校園英文笑話閱讀
笑話是文化的重要組成部分,通過笑話,我們可以了解一個國家的文化內(nèi)涵。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享爆笑校園英文笑話，希望可以幫助大家!
爆笑校園英文笑話：Ten Again
A man said to his wife, "what would you most like for your birthday"
She replied, "I'd love to be Ten again".
On the morning of her birthday, he gets her up bright and early and off they go to a theme Park.Every ride in the Park, he puts her on it.The Death Slide, The Screaming loop, The Wall of Fear,everything there is she has a ride. She staggers out of the theme park five hours later, her head is reeling and her stomach upside down. Into MacDonald's they go, where she's given a Double Big Mac with extra fries. Then off to cinema to see Star Wars, more burgers, popcorn, Cola and sweets.
At last she staggers home with her husband and collapses in to bed. Husband leans over and says, "Well dear what was it like being ten again? "
One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually, I meant dress size!"
爆笑校園英文笑話：Ladies Room
A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet, rural pub. She gesturesalluringly to the barman who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. He does so and she begins to gentlycaress his beard, which is full and bushy.
"Are you the landlord?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.
"Actually, no" he replies.
"Well, can you get him for me - I need to speak to him?" the woman asks, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his thick hair.
"I'm afraid I can't," breathes the barman -clearly aroused "is there anything I can do?".
"Yes there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to lick them gently. "Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room.".
爆笑校園英文笑話：Deer Tracks
Two lawyers were out hunting when they came upon a pair of tracks. They stopped and examined the tracks closely.
The first lawyer announced, "Those are deer tracks. It's deer season, so we should follow the tracks and find our prey."
The second lawyer responded, "Those are clearly elk tracks, and elk are out of season. If we follow your advice, we'll waste the day."
Each attorney believed himself to be the superior woodsmen, and they both bitterly stuck to their guns.
They were still arguing when the train hit them.
爆笑校園英文笑話：Night Pee
An elderly couple go to their doctor for a checkup. The man goes in first. "How're you doing?" asks the doctor.
"Pretty good," answers the old man. "I'm eating well, and I'm still in control of my bowelsand bladder. In fact, when I get up at night to pee, the good Lord turns the light on for me."
The doctor decides not to comment on that last statement, and goes into the next room to check on the man's wife.
"How're you feeling?" he asks.
"I'm doing well," answers the old woman. "I still have lots of energy and I'm not feeling any pain."
The doctor says, "That's nice. It sounds like you and your husband are both doing well. One thing though - your husband said that when he gets up to pee at night, the good Lord turns the light on for him. Do you have any idea what he means?"
"Oh No," says the woman, "He's peeing in the refrigerator again."
爆笑校園英文笑話：Engineer's Problem
Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer.
The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last one said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic wastepipeline through a recreational area?"
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