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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ) > 英語(yǔ)閱讀 > 英語(yǔ)笑話 > 關(guān)于較短的英文笑話閱讀

關(guān)于較短的英文笑話閱讀

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

關(guān)于較短的英文笑話閱讀

  冷笑話是近幾年新興的一種語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象,它輕松詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕松的情趣,它一出現(xiàn)便受到了大多數(shù)人的喜愛(ài)。小編精心收集了關(guān)于較短的英文笑話,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

  關(guān)于較短的英文笑話:Shocked Old Ladies

  Three old ladies are sitting in the park on a beautiful spring day feeding the pigeons and the squirrels, when suddenly, a man in a long trench coat jumps in front of them and throws open his coat. He's completely naked under his jacket. The three old ladies haven't seen such a thing in a very long time, and their blood pressure shoots up quickly. The first old lady lets out a gaspand has a stroke. The second old lady sees this and it's too much for her — she gasps and has a stroke, too. The third old lady didn't have a stroke — she was sitting too far away and couldn't reach.

  關(guān)于較短的英文笑話:Three Drunk Women

  Three women left separately after a very late night out drinking Guinness until the early hours. They met the next day for an early pint, and compared notes about who had been the most drunk.

  The first gal claims that she was the drunkest, saying, "I drove straight home, walked into the house, and as soon as I got through the door, I blew chunks".

  To which the second gal replied, "You think that was drunk? I got in my car, drove out of the parking lot, and wrapped my car around the first tree I saw. I don't even have insurance!"

  And the third proclaimed, "I was by far the most drunk. I got home, I go in a big fight with my husband, knocked a candle over and burned the whole house down!"

  They all looked at each other for a moment. Then the first gal says: "Ladies, I don't think you understand. Chunks is my dog."

  關(guān)于較短的英文笑話:Naked Accident

  A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend. She was thrilled with the speed. "If I do 150mph will you take off your clothes?" he asked. "Yes" said the girl.

  When he got to 150mph, she peeled off her clothes. The boyfriend couldn't keep his eyes on the road,and soon went off into the woods, crashing the car. She was flung clear of thewreckage, but he was stuck

  between the steering wheel and the seat.

  "Go and get help" he cried

  "But I can't, I'm naked and my clothes are gone" said the girl.

  "Take my shoe and cover your fanny Go quickly"

  She came up on a service station and said to the bloke behind the counter "Quick help me, my boyfriend's stuck" The bloke looked at the shoe and said "There's nothing I can do lady, he's in way too far"

  關(guān)于較短的英文笑話:Getting Weighed

  Joe took his blind date to the carnival. "What would you like to do first, Kim?" asked Joe.

  "I want to get weighed," she said.

  They ambled over to the weight guesser. He guessed 120 pounds. She got on the scale; it read 117 and she won a prize.

  Next the couple went on the ferris wheel. When the ride was over, Joe again asked Kim what she would like to do.

  "I want to get weighed," she said.

  Back to the weight guesser they went.

  Since they had been there before, he guessed her correct weight and Joe lost his dollar. The couple walked around the carnival and again he asked where to next.

  "I want to get weighed, "she responded.

  By this time, Joe figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

  Her roommate, Laura, asked her about the blind date, "How'd it go?"

  Kim responded, "Oh, Waura, it was wousy.

  關(guān)于較短的英文笑話:Working Together

  At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?"

  The little boy nodded in the affirmative.

  "Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?"

  The little boy nodded yes.

  "So," the coach continued, "when a strike is called, or you're out at first, you don't argue orcurse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?"

  Again the little boy nodded.

  "Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain it to your mother."

  
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