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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ) > 英語(yǔ)閱讀 > 英語(yǔ)笑話(huà) > 短篇英文笑話(huà)故事閱讀

短篇英文笑話(huà)故事閱讀

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

短篇英文笑話(huà)故事閱讀

  英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)輕松詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕松的情趣。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享短篇英文笑話(huà)故事,希望可以幫助大家!

  短篇英文笑話(huà)故事:Be Much Worse

  Policeman: Why didn't you shout for help when you were robbed of your watch?

  Man: If I had opened my mouth, they'd have found my four gold teeth. That would be much worse.

  可能更糟

  警察:當(dāng)你的手表被搶的時(shí)候,你為什么不大聲喊叫呢?

  男士:如果我張嘴喊叫,他們就會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)我的四顆金牙。那樣情況就更糟了!

  短篇英文笑話(huà)故事:Contented Married Life

  A man was telling one of his friends the secret of his contented married life, "My wife makes all the small decisions," he explained, "and I make all the big ones, so we never interfere in each other's business and never get annoyed with each other. We have no complaints and no arguments."

  "That sounds reasonable," answered his friend sympathetically. "And what sort of decisions does your wife make?"

  "Well," answered the man, "she decides what jobs I apply for, what sort of house we live in, what furniture we have, where we go for our holidays, and things like that."

  His friend was surprised. "Oh?" he said. "And what do you consider important decisions then?"

  "Well," answered the man, "I decide who should be Prime Minister, whether we should increase our help to poor countries, what we should do about the atom bomb, and things like that."

  令人滿(mǎn)意的婚姻生活

  一個(gè)男人告訴他的朋友自己婚姻幸福美滿(mǎn)的秘密,“小事都由我妻子決定,”他解釋說(shuō):“而我只管大事,我們從不互相干涉,從不生對(duì)方的氣。我們從來(lái)沒(méi)有抱怨、沒(méi)有爭(zhēng)吵。”

  “聽(tīng)起來(lái)很有道理,”他的朋友深有同感,“有哪些事情由你妻子作決定呢?”

  “嗯,”那個(gè)人回答說(shuō):“她決定我申請(qǐng)什么工作,我們住什么房子,買(mǎi)什么家具,去哪里度假這些事情。”

  他的朋友很驚奇的問(wèn)道:“哦?那么你決定哪些重要事情?”

  “嗯,”他回答:“我決定誰(shuí)來(lái)當(dāng)首相,我們是否要增加對(duì)貧困國(guó)家的援助,怎么處理原子彈等等這些問(wèn)題。”

  短篇英文笑話(huà)故事:Talking on the Telephone

  Each Sunday the minister called the children to the front of the church while he told them a story. Once he brought a telephone to better illustrate the idea of prayer.

  "You talk to people on the telephone and don't see them on the other end of the line, right?" he began.

  The children nodded yes. "Well, talking to God is like talking on the telephone. He's on the other end, but you can't see him. He is listening though."

  Just then a little boy piped up and asked, "What's his number?"

  在電話(huà)中交談

  每個(gè)星期天牧師都會(huì)把孩子們叫到教堂前面,然后給他們講一個(gè)故事。一天,他為了更好地闡述祈禱的含義,帶來(lái)了一臺(tái)電話(huà)機(jī)。

  “你們和別人在電話(huà)里交談,并沒(méi)有看到電話(huà)線(xiàn)另一端的人,對(duì)嗎?”他開(kāi)始問(wèn)道。孩子們點(diǎn)頭稱(chēng)是。“好的,和上帝交談就象通過(guò)電話(huà)交談一樣。他就在另一端,雖然你看不見(jiàn)他,但是他正在聆聽(tīng)你的心聲。”

  就在這時(shí),一個(gè)小男孩尖著嗓子問(wèn)道:“那他的電話(huà)號(hào)碼是什么?”

  短篇英文笑話(huà)故事:沒(méi)問(wèn)題

  A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop. "How can I help you?" asked the stylist. "I went for a hair transplant," the guy explained, "but I couldn't stand the pain. If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you ,000."

  "No problem," said the stylist, and he quickly shaved his head.

  沒(méi)問(wèn)題

  一個(gè)禿頭的男人坐在理發(fā)店里。發(fā)型師問(wèn):“有什么可以幫你嗎?”那個(gè)人解釋說(shuō):“我本來(lái)去做頭發(fā)移植,但實(shí)在太痛了。如果你能夠讓我的頭發(fā)看起來(lái)像你的一樣,而且沒(méi)有任何痛苦,我將付給你5000美元。”

  “沒(méi)問(wèn)題,”發(fā)型師說(shuō),然后他很快幫自己剃了個(gè)光頭。

  短篇英文笑話(huà)故事:Not Knowing Her Well

  Wife: Bill, the man in that house opposite always kisses his wife when he leaves in the morning and he kisses her again when he comes back in the evening. Why don't you do that too?

  Husband: Well, I don't know her very well yet.

  我跟她還不熟

  妻子:比爾,住在對(duì)面那所房子的那個(gè)男人早上出門(mén)前總要吻一下妻子,晚上回來(lái)時(shí)再吻一下,你為什么不那樣做呢?”

  丈夫:哦,我跟她還不是很熟。

  
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