稍長(zhǎng)點(diǎn)的英文笑話精選
稍長(zhǎng)點(diǎn)的英文笑話精選
網(wǎng)絡(luò)笑話最后往往會(huì)發(fā)展成網(wǎng)絡(luò)流行語(yǔ),網(wǎng)友互相聯(lián)系或者開玩笑用。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了稍長(zhǎng)點(diǎn)的英文笑話,歡迎閱讀!
稍長(zhǎng)點(diǎn)的英文笑話:Napoleon Was Ill
Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year.
"He‘s a good boy," said Jack‘s father, "and if you let him pass this time, I‘m sure he‘ll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well."
"No, no, that‘s quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn‘t know!"
"Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack‘s father. "You see, I‘m afraid we don‘t take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."
拿破侖病了
杰克到一所大學(xué)去學(xué)歷史。第一學(xué)期結(jié)束時(shí),歷史課教授沒(méi)讓他及格。學(xué)校讓他退學(xué)。然而,杰克的父親決定去見教授,強(qiáng)烈要求讓杰克繼續(xù)來(lái)年的學(xué)業(yè)。
“他是個(gè)好孩子,”杰克的父親說(shuō):“您要是讓他這次及格,我相信他明年會(huì)有很大進(jìn)步,學(xué)期結(jié)束時(shí),他一定會(huì)考好的。”
“不,不,那不可能,”教授馬上回答。“你知道嗎?上個(gè)月我問(wèn)他拿破侖什么時(shí)候死的,他都不知道。”
“先生,請(qǐng)?jiān)俳o他一次機(jī)會(huì)吧。”杰克的父親說(shuō):“你不知道,恐怕是因?yàn)槲覀兗覜](méi)有訂報(bào)紙。我們家的人連拿破侖病了都不知道。”
稍長(zhǎng)點(diǎn)的英文笑話:鸚鵡
There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot.There werethree parrots in the shop. One was ,000; another one, ,000; andthe third one, ,000. The customer asked the owner, “How come this guy is,000? That’s so expensive for this kindof parrot.” The owner said, “Because Ihave trained him and he can talk.” So the customer asked him, “How about thisguy? What can he do that makes him so expensive?” The owner said, “Well, apartfrom talking, he can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on.That’s why he’s so expensive.” Then the customer said, “How about the thirdone? What canhe do that makes him so expensive?” The owner of the shopsaid, “Idon’t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, norsing, nothing at all! But the other two call him ‘The Boss.’”
老板最大 有個(gè)人到一間商店買鸚鵡。店里有三只鸚鵡,其中一只賣五千元,另一只賣一萬(wàn)元,還有一只賣三萬(wàn)元。顧客問(wèn)老板:「為什么這只要賣五千元?這個(gè)價(jià)錢對(duì)這種鸚鵡來(lái)說(shuō)太貴了!」老板說(shuō):「因?yàn)槲矣杏?xùn)練他講話?!诡櫩陀謫?wèn):「那這只呢?他會(huì)做什么?為什么要賣這么貴?」老板說(shuō):「他除了會(huì)說(shuō)話之外,還會(huì)表演一些有趣的動(dòng)作,好比說(shuō)跳舞等等,所以才賣這么貴?!诡櫩徒又謫?wèn):「那第三只呢?他會(huì)做什么?為什么要賣這么貴?」老板說(shuō):「我不知道。我從沒(méi)聽過(guò)他講話、吹口哨或唱歌,也沒(méi)看過(guò)他跳舞,什么都沒(méi)有!不過(guò)另外兩只叫他:『老板!』」
稍長(zhǎng)點(diǎn)的英文笑話:Be Careful What You Wish For
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.
During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.
慎重許愿
一對(duì)結(jié)婚25周年的夫妻在慶祝他們六十歲的生日。他們恰好在同一天出生。
慶?;顒?dòng)中,一位仙女出現(xiàn)了。她說(shuō),由于他們是已經(jīng)結(jié)婚25年的恩愛(ài)夫妻,因此她給許給這對(duì)夫妻每個(gè)人一個(gè)愿望。
妻子想周游世界。仙女招了招手。“呯!”的一聲,她的手中出現(xiàn)了一張票。
接下來(lái)該丈夫許愿了。他猶豫片刻,害羞地說(shuō),“那我想要一位比我年輕30歲的女人。”
仙女拾起了魔術(shù)棒。“呯!”,他變成了90歲。
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