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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語 > 英語閱讀 > 英語笑話 > 有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文欣賞

有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文欣賞

時間: 韋彥867 分享

有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文欣賞

  當(dāng)一個人笑的時候,大腦神經(jīng)會放松一會兒,從而使大腦有更多的休息時間。為了自己的身體健康,平時大家可以多看看英語笑話讓自己放松一下。本文是有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文,希望對大家有幫助!

  有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文:我要出去

  A bar owner locked up his place at 2 a. m. and went home to sleep. He had been in bed only a few minutes when the phone rang." What time do you open up in the morning ?" he heard an obviously inebriated man inquire.

  在凌晨兩點,酒吧店主鎖了店門,回家睡覺。他剛躺下幾分鐘,這時電話響了。“你早上幾點營業(yè)?”他聽到一位明顯已醉醺醺的男子的聲音。

  The owner was so furious, he slammed down the receiver and went back to bed. A few minutes later there was another call and he heard the same voice ask the same question. "Listen," the owner shouted ,"there's no sense in asking me what time I open because I wouldn't let a person in your condition in-"

  店主非常氣憤,砰地一聲掛上電話又上床去睡。幾分鐘后又有一個電話,他聽到還是那個聲音問同樣的問題。“聽著,”店主嚷道,“不要問我什么時候營業(yè),因為我不會讓你這種人進----”

  "I don't want to get in," the caller interjected. "I want to get out“

  我不是想進來,”那人打斷他的話,“我要出去。”

  有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文:母親的腳

  To prevent our dog, Lacy, from pestering visitors to our house, my mother often massaged her as she lounged beneath the kitchen table, her favorite resting spot. One day a contractor came over to talk about a home-improvement project.

  為避免我們的狗,萊希,糾纏來訪的客人,我母親常在愛犬喜歡呆的地方,即餐桌下面,摩昵它。一天,一個建筑商來談居室裝潢工程。

  As he and my mother sat across the table discussing the renovations, my mother slipped off her shoes and mindlessly soothed Lacy with her feet.

  在這人和我母親坐在餐桌邊談居室的修茸時,我母親滑脫了她的鞋子,開始不經(jīng)意地用腳摩蹭起萊希來。

  My mother had been talking for about a half-hour when to her great embarrassment she heard Lacy bark outside the front door.

  談話進行了半個小時的時候,我母親突然感到很不好意思起來,因為這時她聽到了萊希在前門外的犬吠聲。

  有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文:猶如幾個時辰

  As a band instructor at an elementary school, I require my students to turn in practice sheets signed by their parents so I can be sure they are putting in enough time.

  作為一個小學(xué)的樂隊指揮,為了確保學(xué)生投入足夠的時間練習(xí),我要求他們上交由他們父母簽字的練習(xí)單。

  I had to laugh, however, when one parent wrote on her child's sheet, "Practiced 17 minutes, but it seemed like hours.

  可是有一次,一位家長的簽字把我逗樂了。練習(xí)單上寫著:“練習(xí)了17分鐘,但猶如幾個時辰。”

  有關(guān)爆笑英語笑話短文:聰明狗

  A dog owner claimed that his pet, when given money, would go to the news stall to buy a paper. his friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - the dog trotted off, but an hour later he had still not returned with the paper.

  一位養(yǎng)狗人宣稱:要是給了愛犬錢,它便會到賣報亭買份報紙來。他的朋友堅持要來個演示,并給了狗一些錢。狗一溜小跑著去了。但一個小時過去了,仍不見它帶報紙回來。

  "how much did you give him?" asked the owner.

  一位養(yǎng)狗人宣稱:要是給了愛犬錢,它便會到賣報亭買份報紙來。他的朋友堅持要來個演示,并給了狗一些錢。狗一溜小跑著去了。但一個小時過去了,仍不見它帶報紙回來。

  "five dollars.

  “五元。”

  "well, that explains it. when you give him five dollars, he goes to a movie.

  "這就是了。你給它五元錢時,它就去看電影。

  
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