簡(jiǎn)單的兩個(gè)人英語(yǔ)笑話故事
簡(jiǎn)單的兩個(gè)人英語(yǔ)笑話故事
笑話使人們?cè)诳贪宓纳钪懈械揭唤z快意和放松。與此同時(shí),笑話也是人們反對(duì)極權(quán)和專制制度的有力武器。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了簡(jiǎn)單的兩個(gè)人英語(yǔ)笑話故事，歡迎閱讀!
簡(jiǎn)單的兩個(gè)人英語(yǔ)笑話故事篇一
A middle-class man decides to go off and join a monastery, which requires an oath of silence. No speech is allowed except for two words every 5 years, to sum up one’s experiences to the head monk.
一個(gè)中產(chǎn)階級(jí)男子決心遠(yuǎn)離紅塵，去當(dāng)修道士。每個(gè)出家的人都必須要立個(gè)沉默誓言，那就是每五年只允許說(shuō)兩個(gè)字，作為對(duì)這一段時(shí)間所經(jīng)歷事情的總結(jié)。
After the first 5 years，the monk asked him what two words described his experiences and all he said was "HARD BEDS.”
第一個(gè)五年過(guò)去了，當(dāng)修道士讓他用兩個(gè)字總結(jié)這五年的經(jīng)歷時(shí)，那人說(shuō)道“破床”。
When the next 5-year period came the monk asked how things were and he replied: "BAD FOOD.”
又過(guò)了五年，當(dāng)修道士再次問(wèn)道他的時(shí)候，他回答“豬食”。
After 5 more years，he walked up to the monk and said，"I QUIT!”
第三個(gè)五年過(guò)后他對(duì)修道士說(shuō)“放棄”。
The monk nodded and muttered，“Yes , this doesn't surprise me. You've been doing nothing but complaining for the past 15 years!”
道十點(diǎn)了點(diǎn)頭喃喃地說(shuō)道:“果不出我所料，這十五年來(lái)除了抱怨以外你什么也沒有做。”
簡(jiǎn)單的兩個(gè)人英語(yǔ)笑話故事篇二
Did you hear the one about the ethnic who came home and found his wife between the sheets with another man? Well，he pulls out a gun, saying,“ That’s enough! I’m going to put an end to this once and for all!” Then he puts the gun up to his head.
你有沒有聽說(shuō)過(guò)有一個(gè)人，當(dāng)他回到家后發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的妻子正和另一個(gè)男人在鬼混，他立刻拔出手槍喊到:“我受夠了!看來(lái)今天是要做一個(gè)了結(jié)了!”說(shuō)完他將槍口對(duì)準(zhǔn)自己的頭。
The unfaithful wife shouts, "Don’t do it! Don’t do it! Don’t kill yourself !” The enraged ethnic replies, "Shut up, bitch，because you're next!”
這時(shí)那個(gè)蕩婦喊到:“不，不要這樣，你可不能自殺呀!”那人聽了憤怒地吼道:“閉嘴，潑婦，下一個(gè)死的就是你!”
簡(jiǎn)單的兩個(gè)人英語(yǔ)笑話故事篇三
A construction worker was rushed to the hospital after cutting himself badly. The doctor told the nurse to prepare a painkiller. "Don’t bother Doctor," said the man. "I' ve been through a lot worse."
一個(gè)傷痕累累的建筑工人沖進(jìn)了一家醫(yī)院，醫(yī)生馬上讓護(hù)士去拿止痛藥，“不必麻煩您了，醫(yī)生。”那人說(shuō)道，“比這更痛的傷我都經(jīng)歷過(guò)了。”
"More painful than this?" the doctor asked.
“比現(xiàn)在的傷還要痛嗎?”醫(yī)生問(wèn)。
"I’11 tell you about the second most painful accident I ever had. I was hunting one day and had to take a shit so I dropped my pants and squatted. I tripped a bear trap and BOOM，the thing snapped shut on my balls."
“我先說(shuō)說(shuō)讓我感到還不是最痛苦的那件事吧，一天我在打獵的時(shí)候突然想要大便，于是就脫掉褲子蹲在地上，不料被捕熊的夾子絆倒了，那東西夾住了我的皋丸。”
The doctor winced, "That’s awful. But tell me, what could be worse?"
醫(yī)生聽后顫抖了一下，說(shuō)道“太可怕了，那告訴我什么又是最痛苦的事呢?”
"When I reached the end of the chain."
“當(dāng)我摸到鎖鏈盡端的時(shí)候。”
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