英語(yǔ)小笑話(huà)一分多鐘
英語(yǔ)小笑話(huà)一分多鐘
笑話(huà),是供人們消遣或交際的一種創(chuàng)造性的語(yǔ)言形式,其主要功能是調(diào)侃、娛樂(lè)或諷刺。小編精心收集了一分多鐘的英語(yǔ)小笑話(huà)，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
一分多鐘的英語(yǔ)小笑話(huà)篇1
My cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bittoo quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both ofmy children had received fire-safety training at school, they did not respond to the alarm.Annoyed, I stormed through the house in search of them.
I found them in the bathroom, washing their hands. Over the loud buzzing of the smokealarm, I asked them to identify the sound.
"It's the smoke detector," they replied in unison.
"Do you know what that sound means?" I demanded.
"Sure," my oldest replied. "Dinner's ready."
我的燒飯手藝向來(lái)是家庭笑話(huà)的攻擊目標(biāo)。一天晚上，晚餐我準(zhǔn)備得有點(diǎn)兒太快了，廚房里充滿(mǎn)了煙，結(jié)果煙霧探查器報(bào)起警來(lái)。盡管我的兩個(gè)孩子都在學(xué)校里接受過(guò)防火安全訓(xùn)練，可是他們并沒(méi)有對(duì)報(bào)警聲作出反應(yīng)。我感到很惱火，滿(mǎn)幢房子亂沖尋找他們。
我在洗漱間找到他們，發(fā)現(xiàn)他們正在洗手。我的聲音蓋過(guò)了煙霧警報(bào)的嗡嗡聲，我叫他們辨別那聲音。
“是煙霧探查器，”他們異口同聲地說(shuō)。
“你們知道那聲音意味著什么嗎?”我責(zé)問(wèn)道。
“當(dāng)然，”我的大孩子回答道，“晚飯準(zhǔn)備好了。”
一分多鐘的英語(yǔ)小笑話(huà)篇2
At the supermarket I noticed an elderly man who seemed to be following me wherever I went.As I moved to each aisle, there he was, smiling at me. Now I was wondering if he wasinterested in me. At the dairy counter I was checking out the eggs when I felt a tap on myshoulder. Turning around, I saw that it was the same man. "Lady," he finally said, "you havemy shopping cart."
在超市我注意到一位上了年紀(jì)的男子好像總在跟著我。我每到一個(gè)售貨通道，他就跟我到一個(gè)售貨通道，微笑地看著我。我開(kāi)始想他是不是喜歡上我了。在乳品柜，我正給雞蛋包裝結(jié)賬時(shí)，有人在我肩上輕拍了一下。我轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)身發(fā)現(xiàn)還是那個(gè)男子。“女士，”他終于開(kāi)口說(shuō)話(huà)了，“你用著我的購(gòu)物車(chē)呢。”
一分多鐘的英語(yǔ)小笑話(huà)篇3
Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. Oneday a fair came to the nearby town.
"Let's go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven't been anywhere for a long time."
Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. Atlast he said, "All right, but I'm not going to spend much money. We'll look at things, but wewon't buy anything. "
They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt'swife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.
Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.
"Fun flights!" the notice said, " $ 10 for 10 minutes.
Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn'twant to have to pay for his wife, as well.
"I've only got $ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilotwasn't selling many tickets, so he said, "I'll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn'tscream or shout, she can have a free flight."
Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.
The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flyingupside down.
When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn't make a sound. She can haveher ride free."
"Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn't easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."
麥特和妻子住在鄉(xiāng)下。麥特很吝嗇，討厭花錢(qián)。一天附近的鎮(zhèn)子逢集。
“我們?nèi)ペs集，麥特，”妻子說(shuō)。“我們很久沒(méi)出去了。”
麥特想了一會(huì)兒。他知道在集市上一定得花錢(qián)。最后他說(shuō)：“好吧，但我不打算花太多錢(qián)。我們只看不買(mǎi)。”
他們?nèi)ゼ?，看看所有可買(mǎi)的東西。有很多東西麥特的妻子想買(mǎi)，但麥特不讓她買(mǎi)。
然后在附近的露天場(chǎng)地，他們看到一架小飛機(jī)。
“有趣的飛行。”海報(bào)上寫(xiě)著，“10分鐘10美元。”
麥特從來(lái)沒(méi)有乘過(guò)飛機(jī)，所以他想乘一次小飛機(jī)。然而他不想付他妻子的票錢(qián)。
“我只帶了10美元，”他對(duì)飛機(jī)駕駛員說(shuō)，“我妻子能免費(fèi)和我一起乘飛機(jī)嗎?”駕駛員沒(méi)賣(mài)出多少票，所以他說(shuō)：“我和你做個(gè)交易。如果你妻子不尖叫，也不叫出聲來(lái)，她就能免費(fèi)飛行。”
麥特同意了，他和妻子一起登上了飛機(jī)。
飛機(jī)起飛了，駕駛員讓飛機(jī)做出各種各樣的動(dòng)作。有一會(huì)兒飛機(jī)倒著飛行。
飛機(jī)著陸時(shí)，駕駛員說(shuō)，“好吧，你妻子沒(méi)發(fā)出任何聲響。她就不用買(mǎi)飛機(jī)票了。”
“謝謝，”麥特說(shuō)，“你知道，這對(duì)她不容易，特別當(dāng)她剛才掉下去的時(shí)候。”
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