簡單又短的英語笑話
簡單又短的英語笑話
民間笑話故事像神話小說等民間文學(xué)一樣，是廣大勞動人民在長期的生產(chǎn)勞動和與自然界作斗爭的過程中，以口頭形式創(chuàng)作和傳承的文學(xué)體裁。小編精心收集了簡單又短的英語笑話，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
簡單又短的英語笑話篇1
KQED radio announced a few days ago that due to lack of funding, it was canceling its Perspectives commentaries. Next morning, Doug Edwards was checking the call in tape for listener reaction and came across this from a woman on her car phone: "MY name is Julia. Longtime listener. I’m very upset that you're canceling Perspectives and I' m considering canceling my support. Please reinstate…” followed by the sound of squealing brakes, a crash, shattering glass, and Julia yelling "Oh s…，you've made me so mad I just rear一ended the car in front of me. Have to go now.” Click. Poor Julia. Funds were restored，and Perspectives is back on the air.
KQED電臺在幾天前宣布，由于資金緊張，他們將刷掉一個叫做《觀察評論》的節(jié)目。第二天一大早，唐·愛得華茲從專門記錄聽眾反饋意見的電話錄音中聽到了一位婦女的留言:“我叫朱莉婭，一個老聽眾了，聽說你們要取消《觀察評論》這個欄目，我感到非常氣憤!我要考慮收回我的資助，除非你們能恢復(fù)……”緊接著是一聲急促的剎車聲，然后是撞擊聲和玻璃粉碎的聲音，并且伴隨著朱莉婭的尖叫聲:“天那，你們簡直快讓我發(fā)瘋了，剛才我和前面的一輛車追尾了，我掛電話了。”接著便是掛上電話后的滴答聲?？蓱z的朱莉婭，其實資金已經(jīng)重新運轉(zhuǎn)了，《觀察評論》這檔節(jié)目也重新開播了。
簡單又短的英語笑話篇2
Yesterday, in a county in south Georgia, a young state trooper went to the local magistrate and requested a warrant to arrest someone. The magistrate, doing his job, determined there was insufficient evidence and refused to issue the warrant. The trooper arrested the magistrate for" obstruction of justice.” Upon arrival at the county jail, the sheriff quickly determined what had happened，and refused to lock up the magistrate. The best part was the state patrol post’s leader's response, in a radio interview. "We believe this was just a minor misunderstanding. We have spoken with the trooper, and it won’t happen again.”
昨天，在喬治亞州南部的一個縣，一位年輕的州警到當(dāng)?shù)氐姆ㄔ?，他想要逮一個人，希望法官給他開一個逮捕令。那個法官認(rèn)為沒有足夠的證據(jù)可以證明那個人有罪，所以拒絕簽發(fā)逮捕令。于是，這名警察便以“妨礙公務(wù)”的罪名逮捕了那位法官?？墒钱?dāng)治安長官了解了情況以后，便拒絕監(jiān)禁名法官。然而最精彩的部分還要說是巡警長官的態(tài)度了，他在電話采訪中說到:“我們相信這完全是個小小誤會，我們已經(jīng)批評了那個巡警，并且保證今后再不會發(fā)生類似的事情了!”
簡單又短的英語笑話篇3
A middle-class man decides to go off and join a monastery, which requires an oath of silence. No speech is allowed except for two words every 5 years, to sum up one’s experiences to the head monk.
一個中產(chǎn)階級男子決心遠(yuǎn)離紅塵，去當(dāng)修道士。每個出家的人都必須要立個沉默誓言，那就是每五年只允許說兩個字，作為對這一段時間所經(jīng)歷事情的總結(jié)。
After the first 5 years，the monk asked him what two words described his experiences and all he said was "HARD BEDS.”
第一個五年過去了，當(dāng)修道士讓他用兩個字總結(jié)這五年的經(jīng)歷時，那人說道“破床”。
When the next 5-year period came the monk asked how things were and he replied: "BAD FOOD.”
又過了五年，當(dāng)修道士再次問道他的時候，他回答“豬食”。
After 5 more years，he walked up to the monk and said，"I QUIT!”
第三個五年過后他對修道士說“放棄”。
The monk nodded and muttered，“Yes , this doesn't surprise me. You've been doing nothing but complaining for the past 15 years!”
道十點了點頭喃喃地說道:“果不出我所料，這十五年來除了抱怨以外你什么也沒有做。”
簡單又短的英語笑話篇4
Did you hear the one about the ethnic who came home and found his wife between the sheets with another man? Well，he pulls out a gun, saying,“ That’s enough! I’m going to put an end to this once and for all!” Then he puts the gun up to his head.
你有沒有聽說過有一個人，當(dāng)他回到家后發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的妻子正和另一個男人在鬼混，他立刻拔出手槍喊到:“我受夠了!看來今天是要做一個了結(jié)了!”說完他將槍口對準(zhǔn)自己的頭。
The unfaithful wife shouts, "Don’t do it! Don’t do it! Don’t kill yourself !” The enraged ethnic replies, "Shut up, bitch，because you're next!”
這時那個蕩婦喊到:“不，不要這樣，你可不能自殺呀!”那人聽了憤怒地吼道:“閉嘴，潑婦，下一個死的就是你!”
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4.英語小笑話很短的